Fat Pig
We went on Saturday night to see a play called "Fat Pig" at the Studio Theatre. The show came highly recommended by friends and the online reviews were pretty good.
In short, the play is about a guy, Tom, who meets Helen at lunch one day and they start seeing each other. The only problem is that Helen is particularly large and Tom is embarrassed to be seen in public with her. Once Tom's coworkers catch wind of his new girlfriend, they unceasingly poke fun at her expense, calling her names, and wondering in an obnoxious way how Tom could ever find someone like that attracting. And instead of calling them out as disgustingly low and superficial, Tom ends up giving in to his shame and shows that he's no better than his so-called friends at the office.
At first glance, you wonder what makes this play so special. Yes, it's meant to make the audience feel uncomfortable, but in a "duh" kinda way (what I affectionately call a "duhism"). The obvious reaction any, even semi-sensitive, person would have should be, "boy, what assholes. Why would anyone go around being so obviously obnoxious and mean? I would never do such a thing." And that's the exact reaction I walked away with. But then I thought about it some more. As David (link above) points out, it's almost impossible to believe that the type of office environment that Neil Labute portrays actually exists (especially considering the type of lawsuits that could result). But I think that's exactly the point. I think Labute takes it to such an extreme in order to evoke that initial reaction- DUH. Of course I would never do that. But then we start to squirm in our seats and think- Wait a minute. I do that all the time, don't I? What's the difference between stuff that I would never say out loud but probably think about in some way or another? Didn't I look at that other person today and inside think to myself, "man, who will ever marry that person? How could anyone find him/herself attracted to such a person?"
Maybe we don't explicitely think those things on a daily basis, but do you feel comfortable claiming that you've never done that before? Whether it be towards someone fatter than you, or ugly, unseemly, disabled, or socially inept. I somehow doubt it. I know I can certainly not claim that, as much as I would want to.
At the end of the play, Helen offered to have surgery to help her lose weight so that Tom would stay with her. Most people have this outright negative reaction to anyone who would even consider surgery to lose weight. I've had personal experience with this (not myself, but I went thru the decision-making process with a loved-one), and as long as it's not used as an "easy way out", I don't see a problem with it. What bothers me about Helen's suggestion is that she went from one extreme to the other without any transition: at first, she was a happy-go-lucky, I'll-eat-anything-because-I'm-happy-with-myself type woman to all of a sudden considering surgery to change her image. Throughout the play, you rooted for her, wanting for her to win the battle and find ultimate happiness. Then all of a sudden, she was faced with the prospect of losing something she's never had before, someone who loved her despite her physical looks, and decides to jump off the deepend in the hopes of hanging on to what ended up being false hope.
What ever happened to trying diet and exercise first? I'm a firm believer that diet and exercise is the way to go most of the time, but for some people, it just doesn't work. And there' s enough scientific evidence out there to prove that. Having bariatric surgery is not the easy way out; in fact, it means a tremendous lifestyle change after surgery- you can't just eat whatever you want and still be thin. You still need to watch what you eat (even more than if you're just dieting) and exercise.
The decision Helen found herself forced to make is tragic. More often than not, we find ourselves in the position to make decisions based not solely on what's right but on what others may think. But why on earth should we really care?
In short, the play is about a guy, Tom, who meets Helen at lunch one day and they start seeing each other. The only problem is that Helen is particularly large and Tom is embarrassed to be seen in public with her. Once Tom's coworkers catch wind of his new girlfriend, they unceasingly poke fun at her expense, calling her names, and wondering in an obnoxious way how Tom could ever find someone like that attracting. And instead of calling them out as disgustingly low and superficial, Tom ends up giving in to his shame and shows that he's no better than his so-called friends at the office.
At first glance, you wonder what makes this play so special. Yes, it's meant to make the audience feel uncomfortable, but in a "duh" kinda way (what I affectionately call a "duhism"). The obvious reaction any, even semi-sensitive, person would have should be, "boy, what assholes. Why would anyone go around being so obviously obnoxious and mean? I would never do such a thing." And that's the exact reaction I walked away with. But then I thought about it some more. As David (link above) points out, it's almost impossible to believe that the type of office environment that Neil Labute portrays actually exists (especially considering the type of lawsuits that could result). But I think that's exactly the point. I think Labute takes it to such an extreme in order to evoke that initial reaction- DUH. Of course I would never do that. But then we start to squirm in our seats and think- Wait a minute. I do that all the time, don't I? What's the difference between stuff that I would never say out loud but probably think about in some way or another? Didn't I look at that other person today and inside think to myself, "man, who will ever marry that person? How could anyone find him/herself attracted to such a person?"
Maybe we don't explicitely think those things on a daily basis, but do you feel comfortable claiming that you've never done that before? Whether it be towards someone fatter than you, or ugly, unseemly, disabled, or socially inept. I somehow doubt it. I know I can certainly not claim that, as much as I would want to.
At the end of the play, Helen offered to have surgery to help her lose weight so that Tom would stay with her. Most people have this outright negative reaction to anyone who would even consider surgery to lose weight. I've had personal experience with this (not myself, but I went thru the decision-making process with a loved-one), and as long as it's not used as an "easy way out", I don't see a problem with it. What bothers me about Helen's suggestion is that she went from one extreme to the other without any transition: at first, she was a happy-go-lucky, I'll-eat-anything-because-I'm-happy-with-myself type woman to all of a sudden considering surgery to change her image. Throughout the play, you rooted for her, wanting for her to win the battle and find ultimate happiness. Then all of a sudden, she was faced with the prospect of losing something she's never had before, someone who loved her despite her physical looks, and decides to jump off the deepend in the hopes of hanging on to what ended up being false hope.
What ever happened to trying diet and exercise first? I'm a firm believer that diet and exercise is the way to go most of the time, but for some people, it just doesn't work. And there' s enough scientific evidence out there to prove that. Having bariatric surgery is not the easy way out; in fact, it means a tremendous lifestyle change after surgery- you can't just eat whatever you want and still be thin. You still need to watch what you eat (even more than if you're just dieting) and exercise.
The decision Helen found herself forced to make is tragic. More often than not, we find ourselves in the position to make decisions based not solely on what's right but on what others may think. But why on earth should we really care?
posted by elanit | 1:53 PM
3 Comments:
You make a good point - that the extreme act is taking thoughts and vocalizing them for the benefit of the audience, not really the nature of the thoughts themselves.
I see two fundamental approaches to this play:
one has it being about fat, eating, and other food-related issues; the other has it being about peer pressure.
If it's about fat, then the question of why Helen didn't think of less-extreme body-changing options does need to be asked, and in fact gastric bypass will probably NOT solve her problems - I know that there are scores of people who have had that, lost 200 lbs, and then gained it all back (how much would THAT suck?). Clearly, Helen is self-conscious about her shape - it manifests in her reluctance to go to the beach at all - so she's clearly not one of the heavy people who are athletic but still heavy. If it's fat, then the character with the tragic flaw is Helen herself, as she doesn't remain honest with herself: either the weight is a problem or it's not, and if it's not a problem, she shouldn't even consider extreme measures about it.
If the play is about peer pressure, then the flaw is Tom's: unable to separate himself from his "friends'" influence and imagination of his life. I put friends in quotes because I'd describe them as like Job's friends - offering unhelpful advice and generally being jerky. There, Tom's unwillingness to be his own man is made all the more worse by Helen's desperation to try to counteract the poison given him by those friends.
So of course people make judgements about other people - what, we shouldn't evaluate information? Some people are single for no apparent reason, and others are single for reasons which are all too apparent ("you're taking a job as an Antarctic researcher, and looking for an Orthodox Jewish spouse? Good luck with that..."). Some people will have a harder time finding the right mate who will tolerate (and occasionally even appreciate) his/her flaws - we've all got them, and a sign of 'rightness' is that the flaws aren't the things which matter to the mate...
Your comment: "at first, she was a happy-go-lucky,I'll-eat-anything-because-I'm-happy-with-myself type woman to all of a sudden considering surgery to change her image" is interesting. Most obese people who claim to be ok with their size are pretending or lying to themselves (or to you -- maybe they're miserable inside). The few obese people I know who fell into that camp eventually tried to lose the fat like the rest of us. You know why? Being obese sucks more than anything. I think most of us would rather lose an arm. I'm not kidding.
David and you also are showing a little naivite, which is good because it means you haven't seen some of the really ugly things people do to fat people. There are workplaces like the one in Fat Pig and there are people who make overtly mean comments to fat people about their weight. That's life.
I also enjoyed this play, although it is *way* past my bedtime and too late to post something intelligent.
In short, I don't think Helen was ashamed to go to the beach; she wanted to and wanted to join the group for volleyball. While her gesture for surgery seemed extreme, she started as someone who presented herself as secure, but wanted to hold onto a relationship that she liked.
The sad part was that Tom could not go a fraction of the distance she was willing... I found the play raw, personal, and worthwhile.
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