Real Estate Blues

Everyone keeps on asking how married life is treating me. For the last six months, we kept hearing how the engagement is the worst part of your life and the first year of marriage is the toughest, so we've been quite prepared, mostly thinking that everyone was referring to what our relationship was going to be like. What nobody prepared us for was what crap the outside world would heap on us once we started making big plans, like, say for instance, figuring out where we would live.

The original plan was to sell Andrew's 1-br apartment and buy a 2-br condo. Andrew's apartment went on the market the second week of December. A couple people came along 3 weeks later and placed a bid. By January 2, a contract was signed and a buyer was found. Not bad for a declining market. Then we got married, came back to DC, placed a bid on an apartment we really liked. A day later, another contract was signed and we started making plans for our new home. And then God started to laugh...

Slowly, things started to unravel. Our buyer was an older woman working for the embassy of Country "G." As a diplomat, she was required to waive her diplomatic immunity in order to receive the loan she qualified for to purchase this apartment. Traditionally- no, wait, actually, by law- immunity must be waived by a government official. This is a very important point to keep in mind, as it seems some people from Country G (and their agents) don't really believe this.

After waiting until two days before the closing date, the buyer got the diplomatic waiver form signed and submitted it to the bank for approval. Unfortunately for us, though, this particular bank did not accept the signature of a "school teacher" as the official representative of Country G, waiving this buyer's diplomatic immunity. Who woulda thunk that a school teacher's signature wouldn't be sufficient for the bank? Man, banks these days...so demanding...

Closing date came and went. Buyer informed us she found a lender who did not require the immunity waiver form and that it would take 10 days to process the loan. Being the nice people that we are, we gave her an extension to secure financing. At the same time, we were told that as long as she took the waiver form to the Ambassador, he would sign it. So there was hope that either option would work. After being reassured by the new lender that the loan would go thru, we were told that the new lender was just bought out by Wachovia and that Wachovia would not allow the loan to be processed without the waiver. OK, but there's still a chance to get the waiver signed by the Ambassador, right? WRONG! It turns out that, while Spain and France and countless other countries have waived diplomatic immunity so that their diplomats could buy property and receive loans in the United States, Country G won't allow it. Country G instead likes to be different and screw with people for their own fun and enjoyment. (Do I sound bitter? No, I'm not bitter. Why would I be bitter?)

So, we're back to square one. We've given this lady enough chances and we decided it was time to just walk away. After busting our butts to get that apartment empty a week after our wedding so that it could be sold before the end of the month, Andrew's apartment is back on the market, the prospects of actually buying the apartment we were planning on living in for the next 5-7 years decreasing by the minute, and we're living out of boxes in my 1-br place for the forseable future. How does that sound for the first one month of married life?

We all say that God has a funny way of handling things but that they happen for a reason and everything will work out in the end. So perhaps this is your lucky day. Anyone out there interesetd in a terrific 1-br apartment in Foggy Bottom/West End? Let us know...